I need more posts...

How about a letter? Sure why not..

Dear [my bank],

Thank you for finally giving me a savings account. It has only been years since I wanted one in the first place... as this was the reason I opened up an account with you to begin with. I did not need my account because I got a job. I can easily turn my paychecks into cash with my signature, and a little waiting in line at H.E.B.

Thank you for denying my savings account approval for the past few years. It made me feel privileged to have just a regular account with you, since pre-approval was required for a savings account. It also made me feel stupid, since I could not understand what approval was needed to save money.

Thank you for not merely denying my savings account, but denying it in writing, in my mailbox, when I least expected it. Those brief few moments of excitement were very exciting... but brief.

Actually they were not as brief as you'd think, since you sealed each and every letter with something I could have used to mount heavy and expensive things on the wall with, and be certain without a doubt that they would NEVER fall....

Not that I have anything expensive that I really want to mount on the wall... since I was never able to save money to buy anything expensive.

Thank you for offering me a savings account each month -- it taught me to never lose hope, and it also taught me that I am able to withstand multiple slaps in the face.

Thank you for sending me a keychain credit card in the very same kind of envelope that you use for your rejection letters. It got stuffed in my 'junk mail' pile, only to be discovered accidentally when I was preparing to SHRED my pile of rejection letters.

But most of all, thank you for teaching me that no expectations are great expectations, because I certainly did not expect anything anymore.

Except perhaps that slap in the face you've been giving me every month...

Cheers!

-your friendly neighborhood account holder.

And now, its fortune time.

WILL THE IMPOSSIBLE; ACCEPT THE INEVITABLE.